Conversation Starters: Are You Always Lost For Words?

Perhaps you are a shy person or you are lost for words and can't start a conversation with someone and keep it going. Lacking conversational skills can hold you back academically, socially and professionally... 

When you know how to approach someone, strike up a conversation and ask the right questions of people, you stand a much better chance of getting your instructor's attention. You also have a better opportunity to get your supervisor's attention and attract the notice of the opposite sex in dating situations.
Improve Your Conversation Skills
Knowing how to walk up to people, greet them and start a conversation may not come automatically for you. Perhaps you struggle to find topics of conversation - "What interests him? Will I know enough about what he enjoys discussing? Maybe I'll be boring!" As soon as that last thought enters your mind, you give up on the thought of approaching someone - and you sit in your seat, silent, nervous or shy - missing conversation success.
When you learn how to approach others and say, "Hi, my name is ________. How are you today?" you increase your probability of successfully beginning a conversation and making a new friend.
Increase Your Confidence
Are you lost for words? Do you believe you are shy? If so, this may lead to lower self-confidence and missed opportunities to engage in conversations with others. Your work performance and social skills may also suffer.
One part of increasing your level of confidence involves knowing what general topics someone might be interested in discussing. Should you be sitting at a party with an attractive girl, you need to know how to bring up topics with which she might be familiar - the latest movie, Hollywood gossip or her job, for instance.
Know What to Say to Others
Avoid being lost for words. You need to know how to bring up different conversational topics. After you have introduced yourself - "Hi, my name is Mary. How are you today?" you give them an opening to respond. After the person responds, you might ask a question about the weather. As you do, make sure you ask in such a way that the person has to speak in a full sentence. Try a question like, "So, what do you think of this weird weather?" as opposed to, "Do you like all this rain?"
Keeping Conversations Going
So, now you have started a tentative conversation with the person you spotted earlier. She's give you her thoughts about all the rain and how she loves it. You might hate all the rain because you can't ride your bike to work. Approach this by saying, "I can see how you'd like the rain. I have to be careful, though, because I can't ride my cycle to work on rainy mornings." This opens another conversational topic. To avoid being lost for words, fall back on favorite movies or restaurants.
Avoid Conversational Mistakes
Look at your differing viewpoints of the rain that's been falling for two weeks. Your conversational partner may love it while you hate it. If you want to keep the conversation going, telling her, "I hate all this rain!" will stop the conversation dead in its tracks. Find a way of expressing yourself, experiencing conversation success.
Keep Your Body Language Open
You want to approach someone who's body language says, "I'm interested in meeting new people." These people keep their body open - they don't cross their arms or legs. Should you see someone who's closed off, look around for someone who has a relaxed posture.

No comments: